Forgiveness is Required
By soundmindandheart In Uncategorized On March 30, 2015
Ephesians 4:32
Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. NASB
Since this is Holy Week, you might expect me to talk about that, but God lead me to the topic of forgiveness. A former pastor of me used to tell me regularly, “Forgiveness is required. Trust is earned.” This has become fundamental in my thinking about forgiveness. God forgave us because of Christ’s sacrifice so we are to forgive those that sin against us. It is as important to forgive people as it is to love them.
Why would I say that forgiveness is as important as love? In Matthew, Jesus gives us the greatest commandment which is to Love God and to Love People. Now I must ask you a question. Who is the first person that you should love after you love God? Of course that person is yourself. Now I am not advocating an arrogant selfish love of yourself. What I mean by that is that we must love ourselves realizing all of our faults because God loves us. This is a humble love that wants God’s best for us. This love is absent of bitterness and un-forgiveness. If we hold on the something that someone has done to us without forgiving them, it turns into bitterness. Bitterness is anger turned inward on ourselves and causes many, many problems in our lives. It effects how you feel daily, your relationships, your concentration and your sleep. So, if you want to love yourself, you must forgive others as Christ forgave us.
You say that I do not know what that person did to you. I realize that really, really bad things are done to people every day. God is clear in the Bible that we are to forgive. Even 70 times if you have to until it is gone.
This is where the second part of my pastor’s quote comes into play. We have to forgive, but we do not trust them just because they are forgiven. For example, let’s say someone takes $20 from you. I must forgive them of the theft, but I also must keep my money safe around them by hiding it or putting it under lock and key when they are around. If they truly are sorry and change their ways, you may be able to trust them with money in the future only after they have earned your trust. Too often we forgive someone and do not set good boundaries with them in that area. They do it to us again and we repeat the cycle. Again and Again. This can lead to a codependency or anger or bitterness over time.
There is hope. You can learn to forgive. If you have to lay something at the feet of Jesus every minute of every day until you let go, do it and move towards forgiving that person. When you do forgive then you are free to move on and love in your life.
Do you need to learn to forgive others or yourself, we would love to help you. Please visit our website www.soundmindandheart.com for more information or to place a prayer request. You may also call 618-203-3444 for an appointment.
May God Bless You!
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